Why do I have this thing in me that I wanted to write something I wish I won’t do or experience before I die? I don’t really know. It just came into my mind. Ha-ha-ha.
- Undergo Chemo – To be honest, my most feared sickness is CANCER. Just hearing the word makes me shiver. I fear the way how cancer is being cured now, which is the CHEMOTHERAPY. According to http://www.medicinenet.com/chemotherapy/article.htm , Chemotherapy stops or slows down the growth of cancer cell that are actively growing and dividing, but along with this, it may also harm healthy cells in the body. Often times, it does. This leads to the side effects I fright to experience.
Here are some of the side effects. (as listed on http://www.cancer.net/navigating-cancer-care/how-cancer-treated/chemotherapy/side-effects-chemotherapy)
a. Fatigue – most common symptom reported.
b. Pain- according to Cancer.net, pain to be experienced are headaches, muscle pain, stomach pain and pain from nerve damage.
c. Nausea and Vomiting – nausea and vomiting are caused by the type and dose of the chemotherapy.
d. Appetite Loss – okay, although I wanted to lose weight, losing appetite is very rapid on cancer patients. I don’t want to look so weak.
e. Hair loss- This is another one of the common side effects that we usually see when we are watching TVs with cancer as the main topic. I know that I don’t have the most silky straight hair but it will break my heart if I lose my strands.
P.S I have high respect with cancer patients. You all are managing to fight for your life. Don’t get me wrong.
- Starve – Okay, so again, I wanted to lose weight and somehow be sexy (wink here) but I fear starving to death.
- See my husband die – It may be selfish for you to know this but I wanted to die first before my [future] husband do. I don’t want to see my love one/my partner in life die in my arms. It will break my heart. L
- Bankruptcy – I am no greedy of money but I don’t want to be bankrupt especially that I dream of having 3-4 babies. I wanted to leave some money that they could use. Like for business or if they are still studying, some money they can use to support their financial needs.
- Cry out of pain – So aside from fearing Cancer which will cause me a lot of pain whether I undergo treatment or not, pain I am talking is:
- Slowly dying because of being consumed of [any] sickness.
- Being engaged in accident [whether I survive or not] and experienced being hospitalized for a long time.
- Have vice/ bad habit – I don’t have any bad habit or vice as of now and I don’t want to have one. E.g. Smoking, drinking alcoholic drinks, casino.
- Die alone – when it’s my time to go, I don’t want to die alone. I wanted to be surrounded with my loved ones. I am even thinking that I want them singing my favourite song while they surround me.
- Be in senile state – as an excerpt of Shakespeare’s As You Like It, [ and will explain it all]
Last scene of all
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion,
Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.
For you? Anything you fear to happen before you die? Anything to add up on the list you don’t want to do before dying? Feel free to comment it here.