Be the number 1 fan:Learning to LOVE your partner’s hobbies

Last Monday was a very special day for my boyfriend. It was the day he and his fellow team mates won the championship of their company’s summer basketball league. On Saturday, he will meet with his band mates for their rehearsal. Few weeks before that, he had lots of basketball games, band rehearsals and gigs already.

That’s because, basketball and playing the drums are his hobbies (and passion).

By the way, he also loves watching NBA and PBA games too!

We, girls, may be a little guilty that we sometimes (oh crap, I am being a little defensive :-p) get annoyed when boys all ever talk about is basketball, cars, gym or video games. For boys, sometimes, you guys would say that watching teen flicks is too boring and cheesy.

Have you all ever felt like it’s [the hobby] all he/she wanted to do? And that you aren’t being noticed already? Do you feel less special because he/she has other things to do? Did you ever started an argument because of these? Think twice, maybe, or yes, what we are thinking and what we did are wrong.

I must admit that on the early stage of me and my boyfriend’s relationship, I have had issues dealing with his hobbies. He’s always going home late because of gigs, he doesn’t text me whenever he watches NBA games and is playing basketball outside their house. But being in a 4 year relationship made me realize a lot.

I have listed my own ways on dealing with issue about misunderstood hobbies in which couples usually argue at.

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Ask yourself, “what are MY hobbies?”

(opinion in my perspective)

Hey, we all girls have our hobbies too. We like shopping, watching teen flicks, cooking, reading, blogging and others. If you start with an argument with them that their hobbies are waste of time, what would you feel if they would say it to you also?

Take time to know the HOBBY.

Before anything else, what is/are his hobby/hobbies? If it’s basketball, have you, even once, watched his game? Not yet? Oh, you don’t even know how great the feeling cheering for your loved one. Knowing the hobby will let you understand fully why your partner’s being hooked in it. If it is not a bad habit, why would go against to it?

One thing more, sometimes, your partner’s hobby, when you paid attention to it, learned everything about it, may be your own hobbyΒ  too. What a great thing it is when you share the same love for something, right?

credits to the owner of this illustration
credits to the owner of this illustration

After “knowing”, study.

(as a girl’s perspective)

You already know what are the hobbies, now is the right time to check if it is a good one, if he benefits from it. Say, your partner’s hobby is camping or backpacking, ask your self, what does he get from it. We know men love outdoors, but aside from that, (if a man is working already), what he needs is a little rest also. They need that extra time to reflect and be able to collect thoughts for the past days of being tired from work.

Talk about it. Set the priorities.

If you still think that you are not the priority, maybe it is time to talk. We, ladies, are emotional by nature, what we need is just a little assurance that, “hey! you are more important than these”. Simple chat over coffee and settling things will definitely solve any misunderstandings about priorities.

Illustration is http://www.123rf.com
Illustration is from http://www.123rf.com

Respecting ones leisure pursuits when accomplished in a relationship will make it stronger. If it is a good hobby, we have to learn to understand it and accept it. I know for some it would take a long process, but believe me, you could. Especially that you know that the relationship, is still the priority. Along the way, we may still have flaws, but those are okay. Your partner needs you to be behind him whenever he does something he wants. After all, who would give him the pat on his back and the sweetest smile he ever wanted? It isΒ  yours.<3

credits to the owner of the photo
credits to the owner of the photo

Please like my page for blog updates – Aika Loraine

This blog accepts sponsorship for product, resort and food reviews. Happy also to receive event invitations. Email me at aikaloraineph@gmail.com

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21 thoughts on “Be the number 1 fan:Learning to LOVE your partner’s hobbies

  1. Mommy Queenelizabeth says:

    This is inspiring.. i also learned it the hard way on how to love my husband’s hobbies… The secret is acceptance first and then learning and embracing. it entails a lot of sacrifices too and pain, but when u start loving what he loves, living becomes quiet, peaceful and easy. Walang gulo lang πŸ˜‰

    Like

  2. bluedreamer27 says:

    I guess a key for a healthy relationship is the mutual understanding of both couple.. I mean despite of the differences in terms of their hobbies, one should learn how to adjust or adopt his or her partner’s hobbies.

    Like

  3. Louise says:

    In my past relationships, we (me and my ex-bfs) have always respected our own hobbies. I let them enjoy their hobbies while they let me enjoy mine. Win-win situation. There were even times when I would go to basketball with my ex and play with him or his team (friendly game of course). And there were also times when he’d ask me about photography and learn rule of thirds. We must really understand that even though we are in relationship, we should never give up our own interests, passion or hobbies. It’s all about respect and open-mindedness.

    β™‘ Louise | http://www.louisechelleblog.com

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  4. mommymadz says:

    It’s great that both people in rhe relationship have hobbies.It helps keep things interesting and makes them individuals rather than a big glob.I agree.We need to support our partner’s hobbies.

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  5. mommymadz says:

    I think it is important for both people to gave their own hobbies.It makes us individuals rather than a big glob.Supporting each other’s passion is a way of showing love.

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  6. Madz says:

    I think it’s important for both people in the relationship to have their own hobbies. It makes us grow and be our own person. I agree we need to be supportive as a way of showing love.

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  7. Marge Gavan says:

    To be honest I don’t know how to react to his post because I’ve never really had a boyfriend. I don’t know what it feels like to be in a relationship, I don’t know how I would react if a guy I’m a relationship with is busy with his hobbies. But I think anything can be agreed upon, couples just need to compromise, because even if people are in a relationship, they are still individuals, with their own interests and passions in life.

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  8. Jennifer Villanueva says:

    This is so on point… although not easy I believe in every word u said.. kahit pa it’s not your thing sige lang. I had my ways of enjoying golf with my luvidub even when i don’t actually play the sport.. I practice photography and make him my subject instead hehehe!

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  9. Ann Balisbis says:

    One key to a happy relationship is to really support what each other wants/loves to do. Either you do it yourself as well so you can join him/her and make a new bonding or to just make him/her feel your presence and support. So yeah! Lets love their hobbies as well. hehe

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  10. Johna says:

    You’re so right about this! It’s also good and healthy for your relationship if you have some time for yourselves maybe once a week to do something just for you. Thanks for this! Great post πŸ™‚

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  11. Johna says:

    You’re so right about this! I always find this to be true with not just your relationship with your significant other but also with your parents, brothers, sisters, and friends. It’s good to share hobbies! It’s kind of like you’re sharing a little bit of yourself πŸ™‚

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  12. Carlo Andrew Olano says:

    It is really healthy to be understanding of each other’s hobbies or pastimes. We should always allow our partners to do what they enjoy unless it is really bad. My wife took years to understand this concept but once she did, I know we grew as a couple by leaps and bounds. Thanks for the post.

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